I just got back from my trip to the funny farm, just kidding by the way. But I have been to therapy, and I guess that means that my record is pretty much fucked if anyone ever asks if I've been under the care of a psychiatrist. But moving along.....

Oh what a tangled web we weave when we first begin to deceive.?!@*

I'm not sure if that fits or even how to comment on it, but it's there now. My Akasha is long gone into the Air Force I believe, it's been a long while since I've spoken with here. I don't even know what role she does or would play in my life/unlife anymore. So, I keep her in the corner of my mind for the time being. Let's see, last you read me and Aryn were either together, or split up, or having problems, or doing good, or had potential, or something, right? See what I mean? It was never going to last, and to date, it hasn't. We split up not long after July 4th, and so that's nearly two months to date isn't it? I hope to be getting the rest of my shit from here this weekend, she's such a bitch, I never thought I could honestly hate her as much as I do now. And to think that even my medication has not pulled this thought from my mind, rather, it has merely confirmed it and planted it firmly in my mind. So, I say a big, "FUCK YOU ARYN." I don't need you in my life right now, and unless you change I won't be needing it anywhere in the for-seeable future. Another chapter of my life has come to an end finally. All people come into our life for a reason. Some leave a mark, others leave only a memory. Aryn, you left a mark that can never be sanded away, and I thank you nonetheless, but it's time I move on.

Alright, so now that she's out of the way I have other things on my mind. Work, Candy, sleep, Candy, blood, Candy, food, Candy, money, and ahm... did I mention Candy? Ok, I'm not referring to the sweet little mass of chemicals I like to put in my mouth and savor, but then again, I suppose she could be described the same way, mmmmm..... Anyways, I don't really like sugared treats, but I love Candy, that's the name of my latest connection. If things are as she says, we are closer than I thought, but at the same time, further than I'd hoped, I don't really know right now. All I know is that I miss her, I think about her constantly, I want to see her, I want to be with her, I want HER.

I know you're probably reading this Candy, but it's the way I feel, and my thoughts are in such a jumble right now, I can't make poetry, I can't make music, I can't make sense. I just know that I have to see you and hug you....

Blessed Be,

-Tristan Silver Pendrake

P.s. I'm still in America, it seems I won't be venturing to England for quite a while....